It's Sunday, about 1700 hours and we have just arrived at our residence in Palo Alto, CA. The sun is shining and my skin feels hot under the heavy coat I've been wearing since I left Kansas City. The bright landscape is chirpy but my mind is being consumed by less than positive thoughts for a few hours now; I'm finding it difficult to understand and adapt to the things that had been happening around me the last few days. The group dynamics had changed as we had been with one another for just over five weeks now and everyone's true colors were shining through and through. We've been pushing ourselves to 100% and over and as mental and physical exhaustion increases, tolerance decreases… You know how sometimes you get a first impression feeling about person that can't quite rationalize? Well, this was the time when everything became clear and exactly when I realized that in trying to be part of the group, I had neglected myself, in terms of my own aims, goals and passions. I felt it was time to spend some time by myself, in solitude, to reset my system into balance. That same night we visited the social district of Palo Alto. In a bar called Nola's, a fine replica of New Orleans, all those thoughts were re-affirmed. The town was not very busy as the next day was a bank holiday… rumor had it that everyone was skiing and would return the next day. There was only about half of us there but it was clear that we had different and perhaps conflicting ideas about social interactions and having fun. Of course, none of this was a conscious or mischievous act; it was just a manifestation of our very different characters. As our taxi drove us back to the hotel, I entered a vicious circle of thought about all that had been happening and I was trying to identify with my own actions. It suddenly was lucid to me that none of those events or changes in my environment had a direct effect on my internal world. Instead, I had directed my focus to the external world and that threw me off balance.
A thought that had consistently passed through my mind was that it would be useful for us to go through some sort of realistic entrepreneurial exercise with limited resources and specific targets and goals. Because no matter how much learning we assimilate in a classroom, it is experience that will ultimately shape our future experiences and ultimately, our success. The more experiences we have of taking something we created from beginning to end, the more likely we are to enforce this pattern in our businesses.
Monday
The next day I woke up I woke up to a new idea. I had a whole week to myself to… do anything I wanted! All our visits would finish around five or six every evening and I could use the rest of the night for a purpose. I've always been fascinated by people and I've been working on my social skills for a while now. Social networking in every form and context has been one of my main focuses in the last few months and here I was, in a new city, knowing no one and wanting to know… everyone! What a perfect opportunity to test and develop my people skills! So I said no to a trip to San Francisco and I got out of bed in the early afternoon all energetic to lead a week of adventure for myself.
I started at Rite Aid where I bought a pocket-size memo book and a small pen. I got some breakfast and headed back to my room to set goals and plan my strategy. First of all, I wanted to make this about me and not about the Kauffman scholarship or the rest of the people of the group so I decided to keep it separate: I wasn't going to use any of the existing resources available, only my very own self. Secondly, I figured that I was only going to be successful in a scenario like this if I was able to meet people on both a business and social contexts. These goals were the result: a) to meet an investor, b) to meet at least three people involved with technology, c) to be invited to a social event on Saturday night, d) to meet a tango teacher and e) to meet at least five people with common interests that keeping in touch with would be effortless. I gave myself seven days to execute this plan and I would assess my success and write about it one week later.
Before I left my room, I searched for people in the San Francisco area on Skype. I added everyone I could find as a contact and when available, I looked at the webpage. Out of the fifty-eight people I added, only two of them had meaningful websites. The first person, Luke, was a big software geek, much like me, that had worked for companies like Microsoft and HP. Bingo! The second person, Liz, owns a blog with restaurant reviews and free recipes and… her latest post was about happy hour at Home Restaurant in San Francisco. Being busy during lunch time, it was most probable for me to meet business people at happy hour. Thinking no more, I e-mailed both of them, announcing my arrival at the bay area and my excitement towards the American culture as well as the anticipation to experience it. I suggested we should meet and have a cultural exchange... of sorts! After carefully sculpting the two e-mails, I left my room for the reception was I was going to get a handful of intelligence about the area.
At the reception, the two ladies greeted me with a smile and gave me a map of Palo Alto. If I was going to make any trips, I had to first know where I was and where I wanted to go! Christine there marked for me the closest Peet's Coffee and Tea and Starbucks, Mountain View's main street and the Stanford shopping centre. The time was almost 15:00 so I set out to get a cup of coffee and do my homework. Peet's was near-empty so I went on to find Starbucks. A mile later, I saw the siren smile at me at the corner of what looked like a restaurant complex. I walked by the outside tables where there was a young-looking girl with "do not disturb" written all over her forehead and a 70-year old lady enjoying the sun. As I went in, I faced five or six tables, all occupied by one person who was either studying over a book or working with a laptop. Strange as it was to me, I could see how caffeine and study mixed well together. This was not going to be the easy ride I had imagined. I grabbed a donut and some mango juice and on my way to the sitting area I made a really quick evaluation of the characters present and the space arrangement. The only free table gave me easy access to three people… the guy working on his laptop at the corner and two girls sat by the window studying. I chose to sit nearest to the girl in the middle… she had a sweet face and a Latin American skin tone; two very good signs of friendliness. I sat down and started studying the Caltrain map, looking to find out where I was and where I could go. Palo Alto didn't seem to be on the map so I figured that my first conversation with a stranger was about to ignite. "Hi", I said before her face glowed with a bright smile. "Sorry to interrupt your study… do you have any idea where we are on this map?" I passed over the map to her and while she was struggling to pinpoint the location, I noticed with the side of my right eye that the other girl sat next to us was glimpsing over her book and to us. Barbara, who turned out to be Brazilian, must have seen this too and she passed the problem on to Naomi, who had grown up in Iowa and moved to Palo Alto when she married her half-Spanish husband. She seemed to know more about the area and I expressed my plans to meet as many people as I can. I explained where I had come from and why and asked where people congregate… she marked another few restaurants and places to be, including University Avenue by Stanford University. Even though the conversation had shifted towards Naomi, it was only a matter of time before Barbara joined in. When I mentioned that I like to dance Argentinean Tango, her face lit up once more and she told me about a Brazilian party that they hold once a month and how much fun they have dancing Samba. Now it was a three-way conversation. Stories of positive experiences involving food and dance were flowing like drink at a Global Scholars outing! Before I left for my next destination, we all exchanged details and Barbara invited us to her husband's birthday celebration on Friday and Naomi spoke of a friend of hers who was an entrepreneur and who she would put into touch with! It was very unclear how, at this pace, I would achieve the goals I had set. It felt like this was going to be a "brute force" job… a series of activities with no apparent connection to the end goal. Well, mystery always makes things more fascinating I thought to myself… plus I was enjoying interacting with strangers and doing my part in connecting them. Even if I wasn't going to see them again, I knew that Barbara and Naomi would see each other again.
I left Starbucks and started walking towards Castro St. at Mountain View, about two miles away, where all the restaurants and bars were located. After what seemed a very long walk I made a left turn and saw a wealth of art shops, cafeterias, bars and restaurants. I walked up and down both sides of this long street carefully looking for the places I should be placing myself later in the week. I found a couple of interesting bars and restaurants but nothing that seemed too business-like. I guessed most business people congregate at San Francisco. One particular bar, the Buddha Lounge, caught my attention so I made a mental note to visit it and made my way back to the hotel. I quickly grabbed some dinner and rushed to my room to get the address of the local tango group as I remembered there was a class on Monday nights. The time was 19:00 and the class was starting at 19:30 so I phoned to reception to get me a taxi, quickly changed clothing and got there just on time. Most of the people there were Russian and I was warmly welcomed. I attended the beginners and intermediate classes and then spent two hours dancing for fun and practice! The teaching style was very different to the classes I had previously taken so even though it was basic material, I was pleasantly challenged. At the end, I spent some time talking to the two teachers who were interested in knowing about the difference in dancing and teaching style at my part of the world…. As interesting conversation never runs out, we exchanged details and promised to keep in touch. Teresa, the Polish lady who was helping teach the class was also going to help me with transport for a milonga (a social tango dance) on Saturday night at San Francisco. Sounds good! Igor, the other teacher gave me a ride back to the hotel and I rushed to my bed knowing I had to get up early the next day.
Tuesday
As I got up in the morning, I realized that staying up late was not a very wise thing to do… we had a full day ahead and I wasn't feeling one hundred percent. When the day finished I still felt tired but I was eager to go on. I took a taxi to Mountain View and looked for the kebab shop I had seen the night before. I conversed with the Turkish owner while enjoying my delicious chicken kebab and quickly moved onto the Buddha Lounge. To my surprise, there was hardly anyone there! What I did not know was that Mardi Gras celebrations were going on in San Francisco and San Jose and so most people would be there. I had a couple of drinks and got some recommendations for San Francisco from the bar maid and left. It was hard to sustain a high level of energy for a full 16 hours and be fresh the next day… I had to respect my priorities and focus on the day activities.
Wednesday
During our morning bus ride, I realized that I had to revaluate my strategy if I was going to achieve any of my goals. Obviously the visit to the Buddha Lounge was a miss and I was struggling to focus from lack of sleep during the day. There was an important lesson there to be learned: it is important to focus on your mission and goals when you wake up in the morning and what it is that you want to achieve during the day… re-examine the strategies and techniques you've been using so far to get there… if they don't seem to get you closer to your goal then it means you need to change them. Profound, isn't it? I call it the breakfast of champions. Unoriginal, I know.
So, with this new insight, I decided to stay in at night and catch up on sleep. I had to at least perform during the day! Later the same evening I received an e-mail from Liz. I had e-mailed her a couple of days ago introducing myself and in my attempt to be hip, suggesting a meeting with her and her "crew"… And as life is full of surprises, her e-mail included an invitation to an MBA networking event that was going to take place in Palo Alto on Thursday… Everything was not lost; I had found my short journey's magic helper!
Thursday
I woke up excited to see what's going to come out of the networking event. I had no idea what kinds of people were going to be there or how many of them… I didn't even know what Liz looked like! All the information that was available to me was her name, the name of the bar and the time. After our day at Stanford finished, I hopped on the bus and went to that bar, arriving half an hour early. It was named "The Blue Chalk" and it was quite big, with retro decoration and friendly atmosphere… I asked the waitress if she knew who Liz was or where exactly the event was taking place. Neither she nor any of her co-workers had any idea. I walked around the place asking people if they are there for the networking event and after two or three blank looks, I saw a lady with a bunch of stickers and pens... bingo. I introduced myself and asked about the event… it was some kind of alumni event for MBA graduates that was organized every two months in an ad-hoc manner through a mailing list. I explained how I had come to get invited so we started talking about the Kauffman scholarship. The first people had started to come in by that time so I asked if she had any idea who Liz was… the answer was "no". Her name appeared on the list of attendants so I kept my eyes peeled for her name tag and started mingling.
Apart from the common MBA background there was not much else connecting this crowd. They had all gone to do different things. There were some people that worked in marketing, others in sales and some managerial people. Come to think of it, they was a common denominator… most of them were now working for large companies - entrepreneurial presence was week. I found it particularly amusing when I met a person from Intel and another from AMD in very close vicinity. Given the history of the two companies, I would have expected them to be involved in some kind of fighting performance. The reality was much less entertaining than the fantasy… Next I met an entrepreneur who was closing down his company to go and work for a large corporation. He said that it was too risky and was looking for safety. I resisted the urge to psychoanalyze him and find out whether his spirit had been broken or if it was never entrepreneurial in the first place and moved on. A few minutes after meeting a lady from Google, I met a young attorney from Wilson and Sinsoni - the company we had visited on Monday. Their way of doing business was very interesting. They are brokers more than they are attorneys… I told her about the program and our visit to her employer. It suddenly struck me that she was the person most likely to know a venture capitalist so I made sure to make a good impression and exchange details. But when it came to meeting a VC, I didn't stop there. I walked around the room and approached all the shrewd-looking characters and "suits" in the room. The furthest I got was CEO. I wasn't going to meet any venture capitalists that night.
After 3 hours of intense pitching and handshaking and as I felt I had made the most of the networking occasion and left. I was already 9 o'clock and I felt quite tired. It was time to get some food, a shower and some sleep.
Friday
The week was coming to an end and my opportunities to meet a VC were becoming limited. It was almost frustrating we were going to visit Burill & Co., one of the largest biotechnology venture capitalist firms. I was going to meet people in the VC industry but I couldn't include any introductions made there… my goal was to meet all those targets without the help of the programme. In the afternoon, we walked around San Francisco and later went to a great Italian restaurant with Wendy. It was also Ade's birthday so we made sure to embarrass him by singing "Happy Birthday" and "He's a jolly good fella" every half an hour.
Saturday
The week was coming to an end as was my little exercise. I had to choose very carefully how I'm going to spend my energy. During the afternoon, we were going to attend the launch of Entrepreneurship Week USA where the week was going to be introduced and my mentor, Carl Schramm was going to give a speech. When we arrived there only about a fifth of the room was full but in the next fifteen minutes it overfilled with students! Some of them actually had to seat on the steps as there were no more seats available! The presentations were all very interesting and packed with energy. I could tell that everyone was really excited to be there, to have been a part in organizing an event like this and to introduce students into a new world, the world of entrepreneurship!
What is however always more interesting than information is… peopled! After the launch, everyone was invited to dinner where we could all mingle and meet others with similar aspirations. It's always interesting to see how different people pick their conversation partners in a group like this. Vicinity is a popular strategy, but also a hit or miss. Someone told me to trust my intuition and go for the person who "feels right". I had nothing to lose, so I tried doing just that. Chance or not, it seemed to work. I start talking to an Iranian lady who turned out to be interested in the same things as I am, like leadership recipes, and trying very similar things that I have tried… like hypnosis. Not bad for a first time. In fact, I'm looking forward to trying it again. We had dinner and talked about our dreams and aspirations while thinking about forming a joint venture…
On the way out, I found Aaron speaking to a girl from Stanford who invited us to a dorm party that night… bingo!
Conclusions
I have to say that this wasn't nearly as glamorous as I had imagined it to be. You can tell by the difference in the enthusiasm levels between the first and consequent days. Nevertheless, it was a very useful learning experience and I did pretty well after all. Sure, I didn't meet an investor, but I got quite close to meeting one. I met a fair few people involved with all kinds of technology, two very interesting tango teachers and perhaps two or three people that I will stay in touch with. Not everything worked out the way I wanted to but I aimed high and nothing ever does work out exactly how we imagine it. Ok, maybe when I'm playing psychic with my niece, but that's different.
The true value of the experience was unconscious for the most part. I knew it would be valuable to me to start and finish something, even small and silly like this. And it was because I had the opportunity to observe myself all the way. I was able to see where my shortcomings are, where my dynamism subsided, where I overestimated my current abilities… It also helped me see that if you want something strongly enough and try for it, things will often fall into place, as if out of nowhere. In my case, it wasn't enough to want it; I had to sustain that motivation over a long period of time. It would have been very easy to quit on day two or three. As I often find inspiration from movies… Alfred when talking to young Bruce Wayne in Batman Begins he said "Why do we fall down Bruce? So we can learn to pick ourselves up".
Psychologists decided to call an ancient Taoist meditation as the "observing ego", in Western lingo. A very useful pattern to introduce in ourselves. The ability to observe our actions, environment and internal state as a third person so that we can later make the adjustments necessary to reach our goals and the character we're striving to be. This is different to the voice inside our head which is often commenting on what's going on… the observing ego is just logging what's going on so you can consciously examine it later.
The profoundness in this experience?
People are fascinating. Knowing thyself is a prerequisite to knowing another.
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